It's a Monday.
Normally at this time on Monday's I would be sitting in Prof. Clark's Principles of Management class highlighting powerpoints and wasting time on Facebook.
But as I lay here in bed attempting to regain all the strength that I lost over this past semester, I begin to think of all the things that I am going to miss.
One day I am going to miss staying up late and studying. Because one day-I'll have bigger things to worry about than the test in Clark's class or the paper that was due for Fine.
One day I am going to miss making late night runs to Stake n' Shake or BWW with my roommates because one day we will all live in different places and our late nights will be few and far between.
One day I am going to miss eating massive amounts of junk food to stay awake because one day all that junk food is going to find a nice home....on my hips.
One day I am going to miss having headaches from school and finals because one day I am going to have headaches from other things.
One day I am going to miss my long breaks from "life" because one day I won't get those breaks anymore.
One day I am going to miss Campus Center food......then again....maybe not.
One day I am going to miss this crazy part of my life. I am going to want the moments back.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
Someday
Someday I'll be in high school.
April 26, 2008 I graduated.
Someday I'll go to college.
August 18, 2008 I began my freshman year at WSU.
Someday I'll have 3 semesters of college left.
December 16, 2010 made that a reality.
Someday I'll go on my first date with my future husband.
March 20, 2010 I did just that.
Someday I'll get engaged and have a big shiny ring.
August 11, 2010 I became a fiance
Someday I'll be a wife.
June 25, 2011 will be that day.
Someday I'll be a mommy.
Date: TBD
I remember as a little girl I would sit and think about my "somedays". I wondered what it would be like. Would I like it? Would it be scary? How would it feel? Am I going to cry? So many questions ran thru my mind and as I grew up and began to experience all these questions got answered. Yes, I love the experiences. Yes, it really is scary. Everything feels so right, so exciting, so crazy. And yes, I did cry and will cry.
It is so exciting to think that all of these new experiences and life choices are upon me now. It seemed so far away not so long ago, but now it seems like those moments that I thought these things are now so far away.
Life has come and gone so quickly. But for all the years that keep coming and have passed, incredible things have happened.
"For everything there is a season....."
April 26, 2008 I graduated.
Someday I'll go to college.
August 18, 2008 I began my freshman year at WSU.
Someday I'll have 3 semesters of college left.
December 16, 2010 made that a reality.
Someday I'll go on my first date with my future husband.
March 20, 2010 I did just that.
Someday I'll get engaged and have a big shiny ring.
August 11, 2010 I became a fiance
Someday I'll be a wife.
June 25, 2011 will be that day.
Someday I'll be a mommy.
Date: TBD
I remember as a little girl I would sit and think about my "somedays". I wondered what it would be like. Would I like it? Would it be scary? How would it feel? Am I going to cry? So many questions ran thru my mind and as I grew up and began to experience all these questions got answered. Yes, I love the experiences. Yes, it really is scary. Everything feels so right, so exciting, so crazy. And yes, I did cry and will cry.
It is so exciting to think that all of these new experiences and life choices are upon me now. It seemed so far away not so long ago, but now it seems like those moments that I thought these things are now so far away.
Life has come and gone so quickly. But for all the years that keep coming and have passed, incredible things have happened.
"For everything there is a season....."
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Afraid....yet filled with joy
I asked God fore strength that I might achieve great things. I was made weak that I might learn to humbly obey. I asked God for health so that I might do greater things. I was given infirmity that I might do things better. I asked God for riches that I might be happy. Instead I was given just enough so that I might be wise. I asked God for power so that I could receive praises. I was given weakness so that I could feel the need for Him. I asked God for all things so that I could enjoy my life. I was given life so that I could enjoy everything. I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I ever hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am, among all on earth, most richly blessed.
I have become so good at being afraid, worried, stressed, negative, and lonely that I have not seen how much God has blessed me. I have been given opportunities. I have been given friends. I have been given mercy and grace. I have been given the chance to love. I have been given the chance to forgive and to be forgiven. I have been given a heart that can bend-but never be fully broken. I have been given LIFE. A life that has been good and a life that has been bad. A life that has taught me lessons and has made me sad. A life that has shown me what hard work is. A life that has brought me friends. A life that has brought me joy.
Have I been given all the things that I have ever asked for?
No.
Am I afraid?
Yes.
But.......
I am filled with joy.
For how blessed I am.
In a world that hurts.
I am afraid.....yet filled with joy
I have become so good at being afraid, worried, stressed, negative, and lonely that I have not seen how much God has blessed me. I have been given opportunities. I have been given friends. I have been given mercy and grace. I have been given the chance to love. I have been given the chance to forgive and to be forgiven. I have been given a heart that can bend-but never be fully broken. I have been given LIFE. A life that has been good and a life that has been bad. A life that has taught me lessons and has made me sad. A life that has shown me what hard work is. A life that has brought me friends. A life that has brought me joy.
Have I been given all the things that I have ever asked for?
No.
Am I afraid?
Yes.
But.......
I am filled with joy.
For how blessed I am.
In a world that hurts.
I am afraid.....yet filled with joy
Yes-I should be studying.....BUT
It's finals week-or as I would much rather label it: Procrastination Week.
It's the week where all the profs give you all the homework and papers they should have given you at the beginning of the year. The week that has you sleeping in the library, eating massive amounts of food that is not good for you, and thinking of all the things that you would rather be doing. The week where students world wide want to kill over and die.
Procrastination week for me has been-enlightening, enraging, and annoying all because of a website known as Facebook.
Yes. Some of you out there in blog land laugh because you know me and you know how much of an addict I am. However: as of this week I have realized that Facebook has become a real pain. A place for people to talk about stupid things, complain about their lives, and make stupid comments.
So, while I should be studying this cold winter morning of the first day of Procrastination week. I have decided instead to make a list of issues that I have with-Facebook
1. Learn how to spell. You look like an idiot when you misspell words on purpose b/c you think you are cool. Get a life or go back to school.
2. Teen girls who think it's cool that you are pregnant-just because 16 and pregnant and Teen Mom makes it LOOK cool doesn't mean that it IS cool. Quit trying to make your lives look like an MTV reality series.
3. Posting entire picture albums of YOURSELF is stupid. Just stop.
4. Keep your drama off your status. No one cares that he is playing xbox when he should be looking at you, no one cares that you are in love....again....and you are 14, and guess what?! No one cares that she is with him or he is with her and that you are the best thing that has ever entered into his life....once again. You are 14!
5. If you hate your job, life, you are bored, you need a job, your bf/gf is a cheating punk, or you have other stupid drama. Tweet it-don't make it show up in my news feed.
*sigh* well there are the top 5 annoying things that I have come up with this morning.
Now, back to being a productive member of procrastination week. :)
It's the week where all the profs give you all the homework and papers they should have given you at the beginning of the year. The week that has you sleeping in the library, eating massive amounts of food that is not good for you, and thinking of all the things that you would rather be doing. The week where students world wide want to kill over and die.
Procrastination week for me has been-enlightening, enraging, and annoying all because of a website known as Facebook.
Yes. Some of you out there in blog land laugh because you know me and you know how much of an addict I am. However: as of this week I have realized that Facebook has become a real pain. A place for people to talk about stupid things, complain about their lives, and make stupid comments.
So, while I should be studying this cold winter morning of the first day of Procrastination week. I have decided instead to make a list of issues that I have with-Facebook
1. Learn how to spell. You look like an idiot when you misspell words on purpose b/c you think you are cool. Get a life or go back to school.
2. Teen girls who think it's cool that you are pregnant-just because 16 and pregnant and Teen Mom makes it LOOK cool doesn't mean that it IS cool. Quit trying to make your lives look like an MTV reality series.
3. Posting entire picture albums of YOURSELF is stupid. Just stop.
4. Keep your drama off your status. No one cares that he is playing xbox when he should be looking at you, no one cares that you are in love....again....and you are 14, and guess what?! No one cares that she is with him or he is with her and that you are the best thing that has ever entered into his life....once again. You are 14!
5. If you hate your job, life, you are bored, you need a job, your bf/gf is a cheating punk, or you have other stupid drama. Tweet it-don't make it show up in my news feed.
*sigh* well there are the top 5 annoying things that I have come up with this morning.
Now, back to being a productive member of procrastination week. :)
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Quiet cold days
It's freezing outside. It's quiet. The wind is blowing. The Christmas lights in the window are glowing and the sounds of pages turning, blankets rustling, and jazz music playing softly drifts through the air. The sounds make it easy to think. Easy to dream. But at the same time. Easy to have your nerves start to get the best of you.
I always tell people that it is easy to jump off the cliff of life. To take the risks and not be afraid. "It's the ride of a lifetime" I always tell them. Taking the risks in life, making it an adventure, dreaming your big dreams-it's all worth it. Just do it.
Tonight I am sitting here. Thinking. Dreaming. Realizing.
When did I grow up? Become an adult? Begin making all of these adult choices? It's crazy to think that I am 21. That in 194 days I am going to be not only a daughter, a friend, a mentor, but also a wife. When did the little girl with pig tails become the woman with a crazy future?
When did all my dreaming become reality?
Why is it scary?
It's not what I thought it would feel like.
I mean. It's not bad. But it's different.
Dreams are great to dream. Reality-you know-when your dreams come true-that's when it's scary-but I have a feeling. It's going to be worth it.
So tonight-with all of the Christmas lights, cold weather, and music-I sit and I dream knowing that my dreams aren't just dreams anymore. They have become reality. So now, I dream about the reality that is about to come true.
I always tell people that it is easy to jump off the cliff of life. To take the risks and not be afraid. "It's the ride of a lifetime" I always tell them. Taking the risks in life, making it an adventure, dreaming your big dreams-it's all worth it. Just do it.
Tonight I am sitting here. Thinking. Dreaming. Realizing.
When did I grow up? Become an adult? Begin making all of these adult choices? It's crazy to think that I am 21. That in 194 days I am going to be not only a daughter, a friend, a mentor, but also a wife. When did the little girl with pig tails become the woman with a crazy future?
When did all my dreaming become reality?
Why is it scary?
It's not what I thought it would feel like.
I mean. It's not bad. But it's different.
Dreams are great to dream. Reality-you know-when your dreams come true-that's when it's scary-but I have a feeling. It's going to be worth it.
So tonight-with all of the Christmas lights, cold weather, and music-I sit and I dream knowing that my dreams aren't just dreams anymore. They have become reality. So now, I dream about the reality that is about to come true.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
All the Days of your life
I am with you in all that you do, even in the menial tasks. I am always aware of you, concerned with every detail of your life. NOTHING escapes my notice- not even the number of hairs on your head. However, your awareness of My Presence falters and flickers; as a result, your life experience feels fragmented. When your focus is broad enough to include Me in your thoughts, you feel safe and complete. When your perception narrows so that problems or details fill your consciousness, you feel empty and incomplete.
Learn to look steadily at Me in all your moments and all your sircumstances, Though the world is unstable and in flux, you can experience continuity through your uninterrupted awareness of My presence. Fix your gaze on what is unseen, even as the visible world parades before your eyes!
Learn to look steadily at Me in all your moments and all your sircumstances, Though the world is unstable and in flux, you can experience continuity through your uninterrupted awareness of My presence. Fix your gaze on what is unseen, even as the visible world parades before your eyes!
Monday, November 29, 2010
The Christmas Poem
I see the countless Christmas Trees around the world below,
with tiny lights, like heaven's stars, reflecting on the snow.
The sight is so spectacular, please wipe away that tear,
for I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear,but
the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here.
I have no words to tell you, the joy their voices bring,
for it is beyond description, to hear the angels sing.
I know how much you miss me. I see the pain inside your heart,
but I am not so far away. We really aren't apart. So be happy for me dear ones.
You know I hold you dear,
and be glad I'm spending Christmas, with Jesus Christ this year.
I send you each a special gift, from my heavenly home above.
I send you each a memory, of my undying love.
After all "Love" is the gift, more precious than pure gold.
It was always most import in the stories Jesus told.
Please love and keep each other, as my Father said to do,
for I can't count the blessing or love he has for each of you.
So, have a Merry Christmas and wipe away that tear.
Remember, I'm spending Christmas, with Jesus Christ this year.
with tiny lights, like heaven's stars, reflecting on the snow.
The sight is so spectacular, please wipe away that tear,
for I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear,but
the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here.
I have no words to tell you, the joy their voices bring,
for it is beyond description, to hear the angels sing.
I know how much you miss me. I see the pain inside your heart,
but I am not so far away. We really aren't apart. So be happy for me dear ones.
You know I hold you dear,
and be glad I'm spending Christmas, with Jesus Christ this year.
I send you each a special gift, from my heavenly home above.
I send you each a memory, of my undying love.
After all "Love" is the gift, more precious than pure gold.
It was always most import in the stories Jesus told.
Please love and keep each other, as my Father said to do,
for I can't count the blessing or love he has for each of you.
So, have a Merry Christmas and wipe away that tear.
Remember, I'm spending Christmas, with Jesus Christ this year.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Wedding Planning.....Really?
Whoever said that wedding planning was not stressful and full of fun was so full of bull crap it isn't even funny.
I SO should have eloped.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Moments
We all have moments that define us.
Something happens.
Big
Little
And in that moment we are defined.
Maybe good
Maybe bad
Perhaps it's something as little as a look-a glance from someone of the opposite sex
It's that one single moment that will be the first of millions of moments after.
or
Perhaps it is something as big as the loss of someone in your life
Someone who has been there for the good and the bad
And it's in that single moment. That last breath. That your life changes.
We all have moments
Moments that hurt.
Moments that make us laugh
Moments that make us cry
Moments that make us rejoice
Moments that make us ask "why"
Those moments redefine who we are as people
They redefine the way we choose to live life
Moments can be unbearable
Moments can seem like an eternity
Moments can be filled tears
laughter
pain
sorrow
grace
peace
forgiveness
Moments.
We all have them.
How will they define you?
Something happens.
Big
Little
And in that moment we are defined.
Maybe good
Maybe bad
Perhaps it's something as little as a look-a glance from someone of the opposite sex
It's that one single moment that will be the first of millions of moments after.
or
Perhaps it is something as big as the loss of someone in your life
Someone who has been there for the good and the bad
And it's in that single moment. That last breath. That your life changes.
We all have moments
Moments that hurt.
Moments that make us laugh
Moments that make us cry
Moments that make us rejoice
Moments that make us ask "why"
Those moments redefine who we are as people
They redefine the way we choose to live life
Moments can be unbearable
Moments can seem like an eternity
Moments can be filled tears
laughter
pain
sorrow
grace
peace
forgiveness
Moments.
We all have them.
How will they define you?
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Names
- ELOHIM
- ADONAI
- JEHOVAH--YAHWEH
- JEHOVAH-MACCADDESHEM
- JEHOVAH-ROHI
- JEHOVAH-SHAMMAH
- JEHOVAH-RAPHA
- JEHOVAH-TSIDKENU
- JEHOVAH-JIREH
- JEHOVAH-NISSI
- JEHOVAH-SHALOM
- JEHOVAH-SABBAOTH
- JEHOVAH-GMOLAH
- EL-ELYON
- EL-ROI
- EL-SHADDAI
- EL-OLAM
- ABBA
- ADVOCATE
- ALMIGHTY
- ALPHA
- AMEN
- ANCIENT OF DAYS
- ANOINTED ONE
- APOSTLE
- ARM OF THE LORD
- AUTHOR OF LIFE
- AUTHOR OF OUR FAITH
- BEGINNING
- BLESSED & HOLY RULER
- BRANCH
- BREAD OF GOD
- BREAD OF LIFE
- BRIDEGROOM
- BRIGHT MORNING STAR
- CHIEF SHEPHERD
- CHOSEN ONE
- CHRIST
- CHRIST OF GOD
- CHRIST THE LORD
- CHRIST, SON OF LIVING GOD
- COMFORTER
- COMMANDER
- CONSOLATION OF ISRAEL
- CONSUMING FIRE
- CORNERSTONE
- COUNSELOR
- CREATOR
- DELIVERER
- DESIRED OF ALL NATIONS
- DOOR
- END
- ETERNAL GOD
- EVERLASTING FATHER
- FAITHFUL & TRUE
- FAITHFUL WITNESS
- FATHER
- FIRSTBORN
- FIRSTFRUITS
- FOUNDATION
- FRIEND OF TAX COLLECTORS & SINNERS
- GENTLE WHISPER
- GIFT OF GOD
- GLORY OF THE LORD
- GOD
- GOD ALMIGHTY
- GOD OVER ALL
- GOD WHO SEES ME
- GOOD SHEPHERD
- GREAT HIGH PRIEST
- GREAT SHEPHERD
- GUIDE
- HEAD OF THE BODY
- HEAD OF THE CHURCH
- HEIR OF ALL THINGS
- HIGH PRIEST
- HIGH PRIEST FOREVER
- HOLY ONE
- HOLY ONE OF ISRAEL
- HOLY SPIRIT
- HOPE
- HORN OF SALVATION
- I AM
- IMAGE OF GOD
- IMAGE OF HIS PERSON
- IMMANUEL
- JEALOUS
- JEHOVAH
- JESUS
- JESUS CHRIST OUR LORD
- JUDGE
- KING
- KING ETERNAL
- KING OF KINGS
- KING OF THE AGES
- LAMB OF GOD
- LAST ADAM
- LAWGIVER
- LEADER
- LIFE
- LIGHT OF THE WORLD
- LIKE AN EAGLE
- LILY OF THE VALLEYS
- LION OF THE TRIBE OF JUDAH
- LIVING STONE
- LIVING WATER
- LORD
- LORD GOD ALMIGHTY
- LORD JESUS CHRIST
- LORD OF ALL
- LORD OF GLORY
- LORD OF HOSTS
- LORD OF LORDS
- LORD OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS
- LOVE
- MAN OF SORROWS
- MASTER
- MEDIATOR
- MERCIFUL GOD
- MESSENGER OF THE COVENANT
- MESSIAH
- MIGHTY GOD
- MIGHTY ONE
- NAZARENE
- OFFSPRING OF DAVID
- OMEGA
- ONLY BEGOTTEN SON
- OUR PASSOVER LAMB
- OUR PEACE
- POTTER
- POWER OF GOD
- PRINCE OF PEACE
- RADIANCE OF GOD'S GLORY
- REDEEMER
- REFINER'S FIRE
- RESURRECTION
- RIGHTEOUS ONE
- ROCK
- ROOT OF DAVID
- ROSE OF SHARON
- RULER OF GOD'S CREATION
- RULER OVER KINGS OF EARTH
- RULER OVER ISRAEL
Names.....never thought they could be so comforting.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Skin-it's just not tough enough
I've been a PK-you learn that your skin gets tough with all the words and situations that come your way.
I've been a girlfriend who was taken advantage of-my skin became like a spring board-the words and actions just bounced off.
I've been a sister-you take what you get from your siblings-nice or not.
I've never been the girl that has gotten her feelings hurt easily. I've been a fighter. A problem causer. An attitude queen. I've been a peace-maker. I've grown up. I've matured. I've found ways of dealing with issues. I've come to understand that everyone sees things differently and that we have to have tough skin to get thru life sometimes.
But on the flip side-no matter how strong you are. No matter what you have found. Sometimes your skin just isn't tough enough. Sometimes the words and the actions are just too much and too sharp and you find yourself throwing your arms up, finding a bed, and curling up in total surrender.
I hate the feeling of defeat-when I feel like the enemy has not given me a choice other than to declare victory to them. I hate the feeling of being worthless. I hate the feeling of depression. But above all I hate that I feel like a problem.
I need to learn that even though I can be changed by what happens to me-I don't have to be reduced by it.
If there is something that I have learned as of recent this would have to be it:
People can write me down in history with their bitter and twisted lies. They may throw me to the wolves. Stomp on me and grind me into the dirt. But still-like the dust-I WILL rise.
I've been a girlfriend who was taken advantage of-my skin became like a spring board-the words and actions just bounced off.
I've been a sister-you take what you get from your siblings-nice or not.
I've never been the girl that has gotten her feelings hurt easily. I've been a fighter. A problem causer. An attitude queen. I've been a peace-maker. I've grown up. I've matured. I've found ways of dealing with issues. I've come to understand that everyone sees things differently and that we have to have tough skin to get thru life sometimes.
But on the flip side-no matter how strong you are. No matter what you have found. Sometimes your skin just isn't tough enough. Sometimes the words and the actions are just too much and too sharp and you find yourself throwing your arms up, finding a bed, and curling up in total surrender.
I hate the feeling of defeat-when I feel like the enemy has not given me a choice other than to declare victory to them. I hate the feeling of being worthless. I hate the feeling of depression. But above all I hate that I feel like a problem.
I need to learn that even though I can be changed by what happens to me-I don't have to be reduced by it.
If there is something that I have learned as of recent this would have to be it:
People can write me down in history with their bitter and twisted lies. They may throw me to the wolves. Stomp on me and grind me into the dirt. But still-like the dust-I WILL rise.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
....Blank
Have you ever just felt out of place, put off, and blank? Like you know how you feel but you can't get it into words?
Yeah....that is me right now.....blank
Yeah....that is me right now.....blank
Friday, October 22, 2010
Homecoming
Merriam-Webster defines "Homecoming" as: The return of a group of people usually on a special occasion to a place formerly frequented or regarded as home.
It's that time of the year again when the trees are turning, the air is brisk, tailgating is in full swing, and alumni return to what was once their home. I sat and watched alumni walk through the campus today and I had to smile as I heard them relive memories from years past. Laughter and tears filled the air as old friends and roommates were re-united, memories relived, and pranks hashed out.
It made me think about all the memories that I have had made since being here. All those hours of laughter, tears, food, gossip, etc. seem like such trivial things at the moment-but in a few years-when we are married, have kids, careers, bills-all of those things we will be able to look back on and smile and think to our selves "Oh when life was simple".
So it's with this thought this afternoon that I sit and enjoy watching people "come home". Home to the memories of years gone by-and home to the place where for most-their lives really began.
It's that time of the year again when the trees are turning, the air is brisk, tailgating is in full swing, and alumni return to what was once their home. I sat and watched alumni walk through the campus today and I had to smile as I heard them relive memories from years past. Laughter and tears filled the air as old friends and roommates were re-united, memories relived, and pranks hashed out.
It made me think about all the memories that I have had made since being here. All those hours of laughter, tears, food, gossip, etc. seem like such trivial things at the moment-but in a few years-when we are married, have kids, careers, bills-all of those things we will be able to look back on and smile and think to our selves "Oh when life was simple".
So it's with this thought this afternoon that I sit and enjoy watching people "come home". Home to the memories of years gone by-and home to the place where for most-their lives really began.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Unspoken Rules
Thomas & I have been attending pre-marital counseling. It's been....well.....interesting. I have found that this man that I love very much has some different sides and ideas on certain things than I had originally though-rather assumed.
We are reading the book "Saving your marriage before it starts" By Les & Leslie Parrott. I HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who is getting married because it is a GREAT catalyst for good conversations and really brings some very important issues to the front burner-we are only in the 2nd chapter & I have learned alot about Thomas.
Tonight though we talked about the "unspoken rules". You know, the rules that we as individuals live by-"how we roll". It's the things that you yourself as a single person never think about. It's those things that could potentially drive your future spouse up the wall and it just so happens that mine make Thomas scratch his head, ask why, and then laugh.
So since my fiance thought they were so funny-I thought that I would share them with you on this cold evening-well...early morning.
1. NEVER put stick butter in the fridge
2. Don't buy dessert at resturants except for special occasions.
3. Change your sheets 1x a week.
3. Buy new pillows every year.
4. Always pay bills at least a week before they are due
5. Never rent red boxes
6. Don't ruin a meal someone has made for you by smothering it with ketchup-this is more for Thomas rather than just a general unspoken rule-he has a tendency to ruin perfectly good meals that I take hours making by pouring the entire ketchup bottle on it and topping it all of with a bag of cheese. AH!
7. Never go a day without giving the other person a hug and telling them how much you love them.
8. Always do the dishes after every meal.
9. Clean the bathroom 1x a week
10. Put your clean laundry away right away and don't pile it on the floor-especially when your *wife* takes FOREVER doing the laundry b/c *someone* has a crap ton of clothes!
By this time in the discussion Thomas thought I had fallen off my rocker-however-like the sweet man that he is-he just smiled and said "ok honey". Hey....at least he has the 2 magical words down lol
Who would have thought that marriage counseling could bring so many things to light....even the small things that you would never think of :0)
We are reading the book "Saving your marriage before it starts" By Les & Leslie Parrott. I HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who is getting married because it is a GREAT catalyst for good conversations and really brings some very important issues to the front burner-we are only in the 2nd chapter & I have learned alot about Thomas.
Tonight though we talked about the "unspoken rules". You know, the rules that we as individuals live by-"how we roll". It's the things that you yourself as a single person never think about. It's those things that could potentially drive your future spouse up the wall and it just so happens that mine make Thomas scratch his head, ask why, and then laugh.
So since my fiance thought they were so funny-I thought that I would share them with you on this cold evening-well...early morning.
1. NEVER put stick butter in the fridge
2. Don't buy dessert at resturants except for special occasions.
3. Change your sheets 1x a week.
3. Buy new pillows every year.
4. Always pay bills at least a week before they are due
5. Never rent red boxes
6. Don't ruin a meal someone has made for you by smothering it with ketchup-this is more for Thomas rather than just a general unspoken rule-he has a tendency to ruin perfectly good meals that I take hours making by pouring the entire ketchup bottle on it and topping it all of with a bag of cheese. AH!
7. Never go a day without giving the other person a hug and telling them how much you love them.
8. Always do the dishes after every meal.
9. Clean the bathroom 1x a week
10. Put your clean laundry away right away and don't pile it on the floor-especially when your *wife* takes FOREVER doing the laundry b/c *someone* has a crap ton of clothes!
By this time in the discussion Thomas thought I had fallen off my rocker-however-like the sweet man that he is-he just smiled and said "ok honey". Hey....at least he has the 2 magical words down lol
Who would have thought that marriage counseling could bring so many things to light....even the small things that you would never think of :0)
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Unchanging. Unceasing.
We traveled again for SERVEteam this weekend & went back to Emporia-the place where I spent most of my childhood. It was the first time that I had been back since my parents moved 5 1/2 years ago.
As we got off the interstate and began to drive down the street that lead to the church-memories began to flood back to me and I began to notice how so many things had changed. New shops stood where at one time there had been only fields. Trees were tall that had once been held up by stakes. Swing sets that had once been played on by screaming children now swayed slowly in the breeze.
As I observed all the changes I began to feel sad-very unstable & a little depressed. The feeling only began to worsen when we walked into the church and I saw even more changes. Offices moved, remodeled, and painted. New signs, new water fountains, and new light fixtures replaced what had once been there and with all these changes I began to cry a little.
When we were done practicing I walked out the front doors as I had many times before and looked down to my left towards the home that I had grown up in and saw something that pushed me over the edge-the tree row that Andrew and I had played in and built forts in for so many years was gone. How could people come along and change all these things?! Who did they think they were?!
I went on with the evening feeling a little hurt. It was at that point that Conner and I pulled our 15 passenger van into an all too familiar drive way-Miss Arlene's. This woman became a surrogate grandmother to my brother and I over the years and we spent countless hours, days, nights, and weeks in that home-I would even go as far to say that we did some growing up there.
Arlene wasn't there and so I went in thru the door that I knew how to get into and found the spare key in the same place that it had been forever and we walked in. I smiled as I took a deep breath in and smelled the all too familiar smell of popcorn and laundry detergent that was always prevalent in the front room. As the evening went on and I walked thru the house I began to notice how literally NOTHING had changed-in fact the toys that I played with as a little girl and the dress up clothes that I dressed up in were still there and in the SAME closet. The desks with the pens, paper, old checkbooks, and markers were in the same room in the same spot and the things were in the same drawers. The furniture in the living room was the same and set up in the same way that it had been on the first day that I had walked into this amazing woman's home 18 years ago. My heart began to soften and I began to relax as I realized that even though there were all of these places that had changed and all these rooms and buildings and fields were gone or different-there was one place that I have held special in my heart forever that has not changed at all and that even to this day it was still a safe, unchanging place.
I laid in bed and memories ran thru my mind-the conversations that rang in the halls of the church, the laughter from the home that I grew up in, the conversation that my parents had with my brother and I before we moved-and I began to wonder what the heck God was thinking by taking us from all this that we had found comforting and safe.
Sunday morning's sermon answered my question. God didn't do all this to my family-moving us, new church, Mom's stroke, etc. to anger us and make us bitter-instead He did it to show us how amazing He is, to show us that there were other people who needed us, and to say "Look-when you were hurting because of the unfamiliar-I gave you all these people to love on you. I want you to praise me."
Unceasing praise. Never ending. Even in the tough times.
As we pulled out of town this afternoon-those words rang in my head and I smiled knowing that even though there were so many changes in the past 5 1/2 years there is one place that will never change and that having an attitude and lifestyle of unceasing praise really does help you see all your blessings.
As we got off the interstate and began to drive down the street that lead to the church-memories began to flood back to me and I began to notice how so many things had changed. New shops stood where at one time there had been only fields. Trees were tall that had once been held up by stakes. Swing sets that had once been played on by screaming children now swayed slowly in the breeze.
As I observed all the changes I began to feel sad-very unstable & a little depressed. The feeling only began to worsen when we walked into the church and I saw even more changes. Offices moved, remodeled, and painted. New signs, new water fountains, and new light fixtures replaced what had once been there and with all these changes I began to cry a little.
When we were done practicing I walked out the front doors as I had many times before and looked down to my left towards the home that I had grown up in and saw something that pushed me over the edge-the tree row that Andrew and I had played in and built forts in for so many years was gone. How could people come along and change all these things?! Who did they think they were?!
I went on with the evening feeling a little hurt. It was at that point that Conner and I pulled our 15 passenger van into an all too familiar drive way-Miss Arlene's. This woman became a surrogate grandmother to my brother and I over the years and we spent countless hours, days, nights, and weeks in that home-I would even go as far to say that we did some growing up there.
Arlene wasn't there and so I went in thru the door that I knew how to get into and found the spare key in the same place that it had been forever and we walked in. I smiled as I took a deep breath in and smelled the all too familiar smell of popcorn and laundry detergent that was always prevalent in the front room. As the evening went on and I walked thru the house I began to notice how literally NOTHING had changed-in fact the toys that I played with as a little girl and the dress up clothes that I dressed up in were still there and in the SAME closet. The desks with the pens, paper, old checkbooks, and markers were in the same room in the same spot and the things were in the same drawers. The furniture in the living room was the same and set up in the same way that it had been on the first day that I had walked into this amazing woman's home 18 years ago. My heart began to soften and I began to relax as I realized that even though there were all of these places that had changed and all these rooms and buildings and fields were gone or different-there was one place that I have held special in my heart forever that has not changed at all and that even to this day it was still a safe, unchanging place.
I laid in bed and memories ran thru my mind-the conversations that rang in the halls of the church, the laughter from the home that I grew up in, the conversation that my parents had with my brother and I before we moved-and I began to wonder what the heck God was thinking by taking us from all this that we had found comforting and safe.
Sunday morning's sermon answered my question. God didn't do all this to my family-moving us, new church, Mom's stroke, etc. to anger us and make us bitter-instead He did it to show us how amazing He is, to show us that there were other people who needed us, and to say "Look-when you were hurting because of the unfamiliar-I gave you all these people to love on you. I want you to praise me."
Unceasing praise. Never ending. Even in the tough times.
As we pulled out of town this afternoon-those words rang in my head and I smiled knowing that even though there were so many changes in the past 5 1/2 years there is one place that will never change and that having an attitude and lifestyle of unceasing praise really does help you see all your blessings.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Silence.
I've never been a fan of silence. My parents always told me that you could hear alot when you were silent. I always came back with-"That's what I'm afraid of". You see it's never the sounds that I can actually hear with my ears-it's the thoughts that go through my head that I can "hear" that make me want to not have....well....silence.
Tonight has been one of those nights where I have purposefully gone out of my way to create noise. Unfortunately for me and my efforts my room is not equipped with a very large and very loud sound system so I have found myself being-silent.
Just because I don't like being silent doesn't mean I am not amazed by the things that you hear when you are. On the flip side though there are some things that I have heard that I really could have gone without hearing for a while.
For instance-as I look at the number on the screen that reflects the balance of my checkbook I think to myself "Crap-another week before I get paid and there is nothing in the pantry. What am I going to do?" It's out of the SILENCE that I hear-"Be still and know that I am God-don't you trust me?"
Fantastic. Nothing like a little guilt-thanks God.
But with that thought comes this response:
"It's not guilt....just the simple truth. The birds eat-so why should you be any different?"
And with that....I'm back to square one....silence.
Minutes pass and other thoughts come and go through my head. But yet again-out of the silence comes another thought:
"Why is it so easy for me to say that I trust God-yet-when it comes down to the actual action of that word-I can't do it."
My thought is immediately met-out of the silence-with an answer
"Kaitlin.....I have known who you were-who you are-and who you will become-where your life will go-long before you were even thought of. Kaitlin don't you think that I have a plan that will work out if you just let go? Do you think that you are going to tell me something or come up with a better idea than the ones that I have already have? Do you think that I am just going to say "No-really? That is the coolest idea ever! I wish I would have thought of that one!" NO! I have the plan for your life set out-the road maps marked-all you have to do is be willing to give me your hand and let me lead you."
Once again-out of the silence-a perfect answer-for an un-perfect question.
Silence. Quiet. Stillness.
What can you hear?
Tonight has been one of those nights where I have purposefully gone out of my way to create noise. Unfortunately for me and my efforts my room is not equipped with a very large and very loud sound system so I have found myself being-silent.
Just because I don't like being silent doesn't mean I am not amazed by the things that you hear when you are. On the flip side though there are some things that I have heard that I really could have gone without hearing for a while.
For instance-as I look at the number on the screen that reflects the balance of my checkbook I think to myself "Crap-another week before I get paid and there is nothing in the pantry. What am I going to do?" It's out of the SILENCE that I hear-"Be still and know that I am God-don't you trust me?"
Fantastic. Nothing like a little guilt-thanks God.
But with that thought comes this response:
"It's not guilt....just the simple truth. The birds eat-so why should you be any different?"
And with that....I'm back to square one....silence.
Minutes pass and other thoughts come and go through my head. But yet again-out of the silence comes another thought:
"Why is it so easy for me to say that I trust God-yet-when it comes down to the actual action of that word-I can't do it."
My thought is immediately met-out of the silence-with an answer
"Kaitlin.....I have known who you were-who you are-and who you will become-where your life will go-long before you were even thought of. Kaitlin don't you think that I have a plan that will work out if you just let go? Do you think that you are going to tell me something or come up with a better idea than the ones that I have already have? Do you think that I am just going to say "No-really? That is the coolest idea ever! I wish I would have thought of that one!" NO! I have the plan for your life set out-the road maps marked-all you have to do is be willing to give me your hand and let me lead you."
Once again-out of the silence-a perfect answer-for an un-perfect question.
Silence. Quiet. Stillness.
What can you hear?
The Symphony of Draper 4
Living with 5 girls has proven to be....well....entertaining. Between the hair spray, make-up, giggles, boys, tv, movies, computers, music, homework, clothes, the smell of nail polish, and the always inevitable squeal-my life has taken on a new "sound"-a "symphony" if you will and on the days that the "symphony" isn't full and vibrant I find myself a little blue. Therefore I have decided to write down the top 10 things that you would hear if you were sitting with me on my bed.
1. Techno music blaring from the bathroom.
2. Bethany laughing at herself as she sees her reflection in the mirror as she dances.
3. Opera music coming from Beth's room
4. Clips of country music as texts come into Lesley's phone
5. The very loud "I do not!" as Chelsea flirts with Andy
6. "Stupid phone won't work! I have to go BACK to AT&T to get another freakin' IPHONE!" -Rachel
7. "SHHHH! I'm trying to watch reality TV!" -Me
8. Showers on. Showers off. Can opening. House creaking. Feet on steps
9. Weed whacker outside. Lawn mowed. Birds singing. Leaves rustling.
10. "FABULOUS!" In a very feminine voice-compliments of Thomas.
Just some of the random things that are being heard today on the not so quiet College Way street
1. Techno music blaring from the bathroom.
2. Bethany laughing at herself as she sees her reflection in the mirror as she dances.
3. Opera music coming from Beth's room
4. Clips of country music as texts come into Lesley's phone
5. The very loud "I do not!" as Chelsea flirts with Andy
6. "Stupid phone won't work! I have to go BACK to AT&T to get another freakin' IPHONE!" -Rachel
7. "SHHHH! I'm trying to watch reality TV!" -Me
8. Showers on. Showers off. Can opening. House creaking. Feet on steps
9. Weed whacker outside. Lawn mowed. Birds singing. Leaves rustling.
10. "FABULOUS!" In a very feminine voice-compliments of Thomas.
Just some of the random things that are being heard today on the not so quiet College Way street
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Mini Wheats. Homework. & Fall Breeze
Its been forever since I have written in a blog & even longer since I had time to sit down and have some "quiet alone time". With 5 roommates in the apartment quiet moments are few and far between.
The girls are gone, the windows are open, the fall breeze is coming in and the only thing here to keep me company is the quiet sound of the heater running, a box of mini wheats, and a mountain of homework that is only getting larger with every passing moment.
Days like this make me miss home even more. All those years of wishing I wasn't a little girl anymore have now passed and my wish has come true-I have become a big girl. How I long for those moments I once lived that revolved around tea parties with the Queen, pies made out of mud, dress up, and fairytales. The only thing left of those days now are memories....pictures....smiles. It's on these fall days that I think on such things and a smile comes to my face.
I have recently found myself wishing my days away just as I once did when I was a little girl. It's during these times that I have to remind myself to slow down and enjoy the moments that I am in because all too soon they vanish leaving only the memory of the times once lived and the moments once had.
Today-I am reminded that all too quickly your life goes by, your moments are spent, and you are left....only wishing....wishing to go back to those once simple times....to the simple memories.
So with my mini wheats, homework, and fall breeze calling my name I leave with one thing on my mind......be content with the days....the moments.....the seconds that you are given because all too soon they will vanish leaving only.....memories.
The girls are gone, the windows are open, the fall breeze is coming in and the only thing here to keep me company is the quiet sound of the heater running, a box of mini wheats, and a mountain of homework that is only getting larger with every passing moment.
Days like this make me miss home even more. All those years of wishing I wasn't a little girl anymore have now passed and my wish has come true-I have become a big girl. How I long for those moments I once lived that revolved around tea parties with the Queen, pies made out of mud, dress up, and fairytales. The only thing left of those days now are memories....pictures....smiles. It's on these fall days that I think on such things and a smile comes to my face.
I have recently found myself wishing my days away just as I once did when I was a little girl. It's during these times that I have to remind myself to slow down and enjoy the moments that I am in because all too soon they vanish leaving only the memory of the times once lived and the moments once had.
Today-I am reminded that all too quickly your life goes by, your moments are spent, and you are left....only wishing....wishing to go back to those once simple times....to the simple memories.
So with my mini wheats, homework, and fall breeze calling my name I leave with one thing on my mind......be content with the days....the moments.....the seconds that you are given because all too soon they will vanish leaving only.....memories.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)